Hermione Granger is an all-star student, the likes of which Hogwarts has never seen. She has an insatiable thirst for knowledge, always finishes her assignments early and, in her third year, took every elective offered to her. When she is first introduced to the Harry Potter world, Hermione comes across as a bit of a prim and proper know-it-all. At the beginning of the series, Hermione stated that expulsion from Hogwarts is a fate worse than death. One would think that an academic as serious as Hermione would be put into the Ravenclaw house, where book smarts are the pinnacle of importance.
And yet…Hermione has a bit of a rebellious streak, one that doesn’t take long to come out. She may not be a shameless flouter of rules like her best friends Harry and Ron, but for the right reasons—or simple provocation—Hermione will pull out the big, rule-breaking guns, that leave no doubt she belongs in House Gryffindor. In fact, because Hermione is such a talented witch, her forays into going rogue are more serious than those of her buddies. As in the girl commits some serious Potterverse felonies.
10. Lit a teacher on fire
Some rule-breakers start out by cutting class or stealing a pack of gum. Hermione went straight to pyromania. To be fair, in this instance Hermione was a rebel with a cause. When she snuck under the bleachers during a Quidditch game to light Snape’s robes on fire, it was because she thought he was trying to curse Harry and make him fall off his broom. What Hermione didn’t know is that she had the wrong target; Professor Quirrell was the one cursing Harry. Lucky for Snape, he wasn’t hurt and lucky for Hermione, in the midst of the chaos, she wasn’t caught. If she was, she’d likely have been on the next Hogwarts Express back to London.
9. Body-bound Neville
This is the first, but far from the last, time Hermione attacked a fellow student. Poor Neville Longbottom was just trying to protect Gryffindor from losing any more House points—they were losing miserably at the time—and trying to keep Harry, Ron, and Hermione from sneaking out of their dormitories. Standing up to them wasn’t easy for the shy lad.
On the other hand, Hermione had no qualms about casting the Petrificus Totalus Curse, or Full Body-Bind. She whipped out her wand like a trained gunslinger and, in the blink of an eye, Neville was frozen like a chunk of ice. Casting curses on fellow students, outside of class or Dueling Club, is strictly forbidden, yet Hermione hardly seemed “petrified” of her actions.
8. Brewed a Polyjuice Potion
Usually when Hermione breaks the rules, it’s because she has good intentions. Here, Hermione wanted to use the Polyjuice Potion so she and her crew could disguise themselves as Slytherins to find out if Malfoy was the one behind the brutal attacks on Muggle-born students. Noble as she may be, this is by far the most premeditated of Hermione’s crimes to date. According to her, producing the potion meant “breaking fifty school rules”, most notably stealing dangerous ingredients from Snape’s potion supply closet and giving Crabbe and Goyle cakes laced with Sleeping Draught. Theft and drugging people aren’t just violations of rules; Hermione is breaking the law in both the wizarding and Muggle world.
7. Punched Malfoy in the face
Violence is never the answer. That being said, Malfoy totally had it coming. After Malfoy got Buckbeak the Hippogriff sentenced to death, Hermione had enough and popped him square in the jaw. What makes this so outrageous is that Hogwarts schoolyard brawls typically involve wands. It is a magic school, after all. Had the wands come out, there is no doubt Hermione would have wiped the floor with Malfoy. Instead, Hermione doubled-down on the shock value and taught Malfoy a lesson the Muggle way.
As fabulous as it is that Hermione stands up for herself, what she does here is straight-up assault. In the Muggle world, this would get her expelled from most schools, especially today. However, knowing Dumbledore and his unabashed favoritism towards Gryffindor, he’d probably award Hermione one hundred points.
6. Used a Time-Turner to save Buckbeak and Sirius’s lives
Hermione was given a Time-Turner by Professor McGonagall so she could take an absurdly high number of classes. This is a very exclusive privilege; one must get permission from the Ministry of Magic to use a Time-Turner. Said permission comes with a cornucopia of rules and regulations, namely the Time-Turner may only be utilized for its intended use and must not be used to alter life’s outcomes. Oh, you mean like sparing Buckbeak and Sirius from meeting their grim demises? Hermione’s heart is in the right place, as is par for the course. Both Buckbeak and Sirius were innocent of their respective crimes and their executions would have been a gross injustice.
Hermione is like a cat; when it comes to punishment, the girl seems to have nine lives. She definitely used one up here.
5. Held Rita Skeeter Hostage
After three years of breaking rules—and sometimes laws—left and right, Outlaw Hermione shows no signs of slowing down. During the Triwizard Tournament, she makes an enemy out of reporter, Rita Skeeter. Rita’s articles read more like a gossip column, as she wrote highly private stories about Harry’s personal life. It took Hermione a while to figure out how Rita was getting her scoop, but crack the case she did. Hermione figured out that Rita was turning herself into a beetle and eavesdropping on Harry’s conversations. A law-abiding citizen might report Rita’s illegal activity to the Ministry of Magic. Not Hermione. She captured Rita while she was in beetle form and refused to turn her back until it was promised that she’d stop spreading lies about Harry.
It’s as though every time Hermione proves to be a good friend, she adds a crime to her rap sheet.
4. Created Dumbledore’s Army
This is one of Hermione’s most foolhardy, but justified, schemes. When the corrupt Professor Umbridge refuses to teach students practical defensive spells—something more important than ever after the resurgence of Lord Voldemort—Hermione founded this underground group so students could learn the spells needed to protect themselves.
Had they been caught—and they came close a few times—Hermione and the rest of the DA would have been subject to vicious corporal punishment. Remember, Umbridge forced Harry to write lines in his own blood. Still, given Hermione’s track record for getting away with things, she saw fit to see this rebellion through.
3. Cursed Marietta Edgecombe with acne
One of the aforementioned close calls for the DA came when Marietta Edgecombe ratted them out to Umbridge. Up until this point, Hermione’s rebelliousness has all been for a good cause. This is the first time she shows real sadistic wrath. After all, the damage has been done. Marietta already squealed. But that didn’t stop Hermione from cursing Marietta with a series of pimples on her face that spelled out the word “sneak”. This Lisbeth Salander-esque move is the darkest Hermione has ever gone.
2. Cast a Confundus Charm on Cormac McLaggen
Much like the “sneak” jinx, Hermione isn’t cursing Cormac in an effort to do something heroic. She’s really doing this to suit her own selfish means. Sure, Cormac is a blowhard who treats people, like the Weasleys, poorly. However, odious as he may be, he’s still a better Keeper than Ron. Unfortunately, Cormac found himself the subject of Hermione’s ire, so she cast a Confundus Charm on him to prevent him from making saves on the Quidditch pitch. After his poor performance, Ron was given the spot of Keeper. Sabotaging your kind-of-ex to help out your soon-to-be-boyfriend is a total Lady Macbeth-in-training move. It’s also a violation of yet another school rule.
1. Broke into both the Ministry of Magic and Gringotts
Assault, theft, kidnapping. Might as well add breaking-and-entering to Hermione’s ever-growing list of crimes. However, under the Voldemort regime, the “criminals” are the good guys. In order to destroy Voldemort, Hermione and co. needed to find and destroy all seven of his Horcruxes. For obvious reasons, Voldemort didn’t just leave them lying around. He hid them away in the depths of places like the Ministry of Magic and Gringotts Wizarding Bank.
What the Dark Lord didn’t bargain for is that Hermione and her friends have an entire education in breaking the rules. In both B&E instances, Hermione whips up some Polyjuice Potion so the trio can disguise themselves as Death Eaters and obtain their bounty. They succeed…by the skin of their teeth.
“We could be killed. Or worse—expelled.” This is the phrase uttered by first-year Hermione Granger, the brave witch who would go on to become a bank robber. If, over the course of seven books, Hermione taught us anything, it’s to never mess with the smart girl.
