Of all the adult couples in Harry Potter, Arthur and Molly Weasley are the pair that fans most often cite as being goals. These two have a long-lasting marriage and seven kids, and this is definitely a big feat. In many ways, these two are the best and only example of a married couple that Harry has in his life and who cares about him.
While in many ways their relationship is great, there are also some things about Molly and Arthur’s relationship that are rather toxic. Here are the five ways Molly and Arthur Weasley had a good relationship and five ways it was toxic.
GOOD: THEY WERE BOTH DEVOTED PARENTS
One thing that makes a relationship strong is having shared values. It’s clear that both Molly and Arthur are on the same page in this way. They clearly wanted to build a big family, and this is a priority for both of them.
They both love their kids a lot, and family is one of their main values. While they might have very different parenting styles, they both care about their kids and want them to be safe and the best for them.
TOXIC: ARTHUR HAS TO HIDE THINGS FROM MOLLY
If you’re in a relationship where you have to hide things from your partner, it’s generally not a good thing. While your partner doesn’t necessarily need to know every little detail of your life, if you feel you have to hide things like hobbies from them, this isn’t a good sign.
First of all, hiding and lying in the first place is a toxic thing. But, also, how Molly acts when Arthur doesn’t do things she agrees with encourages him needing to lie to her. So, all around, it’s just not a healthy dynamic.
GOOD: BOTH OF THEM WERE DEVOTED TO BEING MEMBERS OF THE ORDER
This point goes once again to the idea of shared values and how important that is. Both Molly and Arthur are members of the Order of the Phoenix, and they are willing to sacrifice their own lives for the cause of good.
They still care deeply about keeping their family safe, but they know that if people don’t fight against Voldemort that their family won’t ever be safe. Their commitment to doing the right thing is definitely admirable and something that connects them on a deep level.
TOXIC: MOLLY ISN’T SUPPORTIVE AND IS SOMETIMES MEAN ABOUT ARTHUR’S HOBBIES
This point continues on the idea that Arthur has to hide things from his wife. Molly is quite critical about Arthur’s interest in Muggles and their technology. While it’s understandable that she wouldn’t want him to do anything illegal, having Muggle technology as a hobby isn’t a bad thing.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with it, and Molly’s opinion on these issues is likely a side effect of being raised in the wizarding world that is full of a lot of prejudice towards Muggles and thinking their ways are backward.
GOOD: THEY’VE KNOWN AND LOVED EACH OTHER FOR A LONG TIME
One of the most romantic things about Molly and Arthur is the fact that they’ve been in love for so long. These two started dating as teenagers at Hogwarts, and they’ve been through a lot together.
They’ve been able to make their relationship work through two wizarding wars, having multiple children, and many years. This is definitely an admirable thing, and it’s clear that despite everything that they still love each other and care about each other even more than they did back then.
TOXIC: MOLLY OFTEN YELLS AT ARTHUR
One of the most toxic things about the dynamic between Arthur and Molly in Harry Potter is how Molly often gets angry and yells at him. She also does this to her children, and while she’s all bark and no bite, it’s still not a good thing to do.
This isn’t a healthy way to express frustration or disappointment, and yelling at your spouse isn’t acceptable. If the tables were flipped and Arthur yelled at her it would clearly come across as wrong. So, the fact that Molly yells at Arthur shouldn’t be seen as acceptable either.
GOOD: THEY HAVE BEEN THROUGH A LOT TOGETHER
One of the biggest points that prove that these two have an overall good relationship that works for them is the fact that they’ve been together for so long.
While, of course, some people stay together even when their relationship is bad, these two still seem to love each other a lot. They care about each other and if they’re alright, and their relationship and dynamic seem to work well for them.
TOXIC: ARTHUR SOMETIMES LIES TO HIS WIFE
Arthur keeps many things from Molly when it comes to his hobbies with Muggles, but he also keeps other things from her, too. This is especially the case when it comes to their children.
He will try to lie or avoid telling her things that Fred and George have done. While he might be doing so to try and keep his kids from getting in trouble, this dynamic doesn’t seem healthy on either end.
GOOD: THEY’VE GOT ADORABLE PET NAMES
One of the ways that these two seem to have a good relationship is in how they interact with one another in the little moments. For one thing, they still have adorable pet names for each other that they used behind closed doors.
Arthur’s adorable nickname for her is Mollywobbles. This just shows that they express they care about one another in little ways.
TOXIC: THEIR ROLES SEEM VERY SEGREGATED
While there are many ways to have a healthy relationship and the delegation of household roles is different for each couple, these two do seem to have a rather old-fashioned dynamic.
This isn’t inherently unhealthy, but it does seem like an interesting thing considering they are one of the only couples shown in the series with a decent marriage. It does seem like their delegation of roles is very based on traditional gender stereotypes.
